Becoming a mum again has been challenging to say the least. There is one thing that is completely different from the last time I did it 11 years ago, Social Media.
So this time around I have had an even more intense feeling that I should be this perfect mum and that I should have a perfect baby.
With so many people having babies at the same time as me I’m surrounded by pictures and updates that usually only show the great times of parenting.
So it’s so easy to think that everyone else is coping better than me and that somehow I’m failing as a mother because it feels like I haven’t got time to tidy the house or make perfect homemade dinners every night!!
Sometimes I stay in bed ALL DAY!!!
A lot of the times we are either eating frozen food or take away (shock horror)
Some days my baby sleeps and some days it takes me 2 hours to settle him at night (he’s a very spirited baby and he doesn’t want to miss a thing!!)
And yes my life doesn’t exactly look the way I want it to right now.
I suffer from post-natal depression, it’s real and it sucks but I try my hardest every day. I’ll never give up trying to get better.
And most of the time I can’t be arsed to clean the fucking house, let alone getting dressed and doing my hair and makeup.
Then I see these perfect images on Instagram of new mums, all dressed up, looking like models (they definitely don’t look sleep deprived) and I get that horrible sinking feeling of I’m not good enough!!!
But I am fucking GOOD ENOUGH!!!
I have to remind myself of who I am and what’s important to me.
The biggest lesson I have learned throughout my pregnancy is to simply be ME. To live my life as authentically as I can and be honest about who I am and what I want.
I don’t wear makeup and I hardly ever style my hair, so I’m not about to start doing that just to take “perfect” pictures.
Because my life isn’t perfect!!
I don’t believe there is such thing as being perfect, everything is in the eye of the beholder.
The thing Social Media does is hide our not so great side of our lives and we only show the best parts. There are a lot of photos are staged or set up these days and we have to remind ourselves that we aren’t seeing the WHOLE picture.
These are just snippets of people’s lives and we shouldn’t compare ourselves to them.
When I have spoken to all my friends that are mums in real life, they have all told me their struggles of parenthood. So many of us have suffered from Post Natal Depression but I feel it’s not talked about enough.
So if you’re feeling like you’re not coping or you aren’t a supermum open up about it and you will be surprised how many other mums will say they feel the same.
Being brave gives others the opportunity to be brave too.
We are all in this together and we need to start being kinder and more gentle with ourselves and others.
Slow down and appreciate where you are now.
You have nothing to prove and you are doing a great job!!!
Remember “less is more”, don’t try to do everything, focus on what brings you the most joy (for me that’s spending time with my family and not tidying the house haha), the rest can wait.
YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH!!
Let me know in the comments below if you have ever felt like this or if you’re brave enough any struggles you have had as a parent.