Do You Really Have To Love Yourself First?

Laura Blog, Real Talk

As you sit there reading this post, you may start to feel instantly relieved.

I’m sure you have heard it a million times, “you need to fully love yourself first before you can find love”.

Talk about pressure and fear of being left on the shelf!!

Ok so I call utter bullshit!!!

Shall I tell you why??

I found the love of my life at a time when I did not love myself, not one little bit. Yes I was a bit happy and partying (so seemed fun to be around) but deep down I felt I hated who I was and had really bad depression.

Fast forward 4 years, a tough journey to say the least and I’m finally starting to truly love the person I am.

If I had never found love first, I wouldn’t even begin to see my own beauty, the beautiful my partner tells me about every day.

He sees the true me and over the years has helped me see that too.

He has helped me see that I am a good person, I deserve to be happy and I see how much he loves me, for who I truly am.


Knowing that someone loves me, flaws and all, has helped me heal for my self-hatred.

Are you beginning to see that true love has the ability to create miracles??

I know that sounds cheesy as fuck but I have to say it because 4 years ago I was a women who could not even understand why I had been born. I hated myself so much that I thought I didn’t deserve to be on the planet.

How shit is that!!!!

It’s not been easy, the old me had tried to push him away so many times. I’ve tried to run away and self-sabotage to protect myself because surly one day this super perfect man will realise I’m not this amazing human he thinks I am.

Well it didn’t work (as we are still very much in love).

In the end I just slowly realised his love is true and I’m not going to push him away, so I may as well stop trying.

That’s when the magic happened, I started to believe the complements and really see myself through his eyes.

I started to see what is great about me (even saying that is hard because I never want to sound big headed or arrogant) but we all have our great qualities and being able to see them just makes your life so much happier.

It also makes you brave.

Brave enough to do the things you have always wanted to do because you know you deserve it.

So if you’re feeling shit because so many people keep telling you that you’re on your own because you don’t fully  “love yourself” enough yet (whatever that even means!!), don’t worry!!

Just believe that when the time is right you will find your Mr Right (god more cheese haha)

And quit trying to be perfect because you think that might help, it doesn’t.

Just imagine how magical it would feel falling in love with someone who loves you for who you truly are and you don’t have to keep pretending to be someone else, even when you might have got a bit too drunk and you’re lying in your own vomit!!



Big love


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